hi everyone. its been a while. and yes I'm still single. I have had some relationships since my last post and you guess it right.. it had a half life of that 213At (Astatine). My best friend introduced him last March just right after my birthday. like as a birthday present or something to that effect.. surprise... at an Instant, we clicked. We have had a few dates. movie. dinner. just like the usual. we enjoyed sharing food together. went to places together. it was perfect. the kiss was good too. the breakfasts right after shift. exchanged gifts. cakes.candies. endless phone calls. the hellos the i love you's.
We did our groceries together and believe me I had been wanting to experience that.. call it corny but I find it sweet. Its a nice date actually, simple and fun like in a grocery store with wide variety.. taking your time in the aisles. you talk while you scan each shelves... you'll know the person better on what brands he picks, what flavor he choose, there's a story in every thing you will buy. like why you don't like oregano in your pasta. how safeguard can dry your skin. which hot-dogs taste better.
so i mentioned the kiss was good. when things got hotter and wetter he stopped. "i think it's too soon for that. Don't you think?" okay fine. He rushed to the toilet, took a bath and found his way to the bed and snored! He left me and my kidneys in pain because if the unfinished business.
Every time I got my hands down under he stops. Wearing only my undies he asked,"are you trying to seduce me?" and i replied with sarcasm in my tone, "no, I'm getting ready to sleep". I told him with a fake smile, "you know the court recognizes this as valid case for annulment."
One day he asked me how I celebrate monthsary... other than its corny as a cornfield I told him, I don't because none of my relationships had lasted that long. The he broke his surprise, he wanted to go to the beach with me, he had a surprise.
Maybe lightning had struck him or something he texted me, "Sorry, I cant make you happy!" I asked clarifying questions... "What do you mean Bhe? I'm happy with you, you inspire me to do good at work, with my life now. You took me to a grocery store and I love you for that". he replied "coz you always think about sex!"
Like WHAT? maybe I think about sex at times but NOT always. So he left. He left me feeling like I'm the biggest slut in this town. I feel humiliated like I cant live without sex in a day! I mean its great to have both, a guy who takes you to a grocery store and the same guy who rocks in a bed-stone. But, fuck the bed stone I want a guy who takes me to a grocery store.
the end!
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
unsent letter
Dear Sunshine,
Pretty gloomy lately eh?! I know I have asked you one favor and you've been keeping your promise all these times. Thank you for being there. I know I have asked you not to leave me. And i know you are just there. Can I ask another one? Lately my life's a mess, at work, at home. Things were just out of place. You know what they say when it rains it pours. Mine is more like a storm... I have been trying to find the eye of the storm to seek comfort and hoping things will be alright soon.
work has been draining. Its sucking all my energy. No matter how brilliant my ideas are nothing seem to work. I cant seem to motivate my team to be at their best. maybe they've seen me not at my best. Home is terrible, my parents fighting, mom and I couldn't agree on lots of things.
I love you... I really do love you...
However we started wrong and I don't know how to make it right... if we can make it right. here's the favor, if you're just there to keep your promise... and you don't have intentions of keeping me... please at least help me move on. You don't have to keep your promise anymore... You're there but feels like you so far... so what's the point. Live your life while i try to sort mine.. the last thing I need now is false hopes. If its meant to be us, our path will cross again.
Love,
Morning Dew
Pretty gloomy lately eh?! I know I have asked you one favor and you've been keeping your promise all these times. Thank you for being there. I know I have asked you not to leave me. And i know you are just there. Can I ask another one? Lately my life's a mess, at work, at home. Things were just out of place. You know what they say when it rains it pours. Mine is more like a storm... I have been trying to find the eye of the storm to seek comfort and hoping things will be alright soon.
work has been draining. Its sucking all my energy. No matter how brilliant my ideas are nothing seem to work. I cant seem to motivate my team to be at their best. maybe they've seen me not at my best. Home is terrible, my parents fighting, mom and I couldn't agree on lots of things.
I love you... I really do love you...
However we started wrong and I don't know how to make it right... if we can make it right. here's the favor, if you're just there to keep your promise... and you don't have intentions of keeping me... please at least help me move on. You don't have to keep your promise anymore... You're there but feels like you so far... so what's the point. Live your life while i try to sort mine.. the last thing I need now is false hopes. If its meant to be us, our path will cross again.
Love,
Morning Dew
Sunday, July 3, 2011
castle and walls
Rapunzel. That's me. Except that, i have a short hair and its not even golden. I'm in my terrace right now, playing with my PC. The city is inviting with its yellow light. And from a far, it looks serene. The hazy air completes the picture. Quite the opposite of what's really happening. The street lamp glows and it hypnotizing.
somewhere out there is my prince. i know he's looking for me. He'll find his way to my little castle and rescue me from this misery.
I know it wont be tonight. I'm in my terrace with my cup of coffee. Waiting in vain. where are you and what struggles you've been through finding my castle?
----
last night, the city lights captured me. So I took a quick shower. Put on a good top. Suddenly, it rained. my friend said, "if there's a will there's a way,"... "good point but i wouldn't be wearing my boots" I replied. "dial-a-cab and drop your ass off here" he commanded! so I obliged.
We went to Penthouse. DJ Elmer was playing. My moves were a bit off. Its been ages since I went out to party. Partly my fault because I let myself become a prisoner of my own room. The music started to warm every single cell of my body up... a beer in my hand and a cigarette on the other. No E for me that night. I wanted to go home sane. That other side of me has been long gone. I don't want him resurrected. I'm a good person now. I think.
---
"where's your prince?"... I replied, "I don't know!" cutting the mojo potato in half. I had been in the dance floor all night.. that made me hungry. "He's somewhere", I continued.
"I think you should date a mason." My friend suggested. Then my eyes went clueless waiting for my friend to finish his statement. He could really see a big question mark on my face so he continued "so that someone can break the walls your creating". I jokingly replied "why not a welder, the walls I've created were made of iron."
---
If you have experience being hurt, your self defence skills increases. why would you let yourself be hurt again?! I'm not even aware of these walls but my friend read me correctly. I don't want to become a porcupine. "Go out! meet more people! drop your pots and pails. gardening is for old people. and learn to know them before you put on your guards. We are not getting any younger so don't waste your time."
---
I'm in my terrace. Its raining again. my cup is empty. no sign of him coming home tonight.
somewhere out there is my prince. i know he's looking for me. He'll find his way to my little castle and rescue me from this misery.
I know it wont be tonight. I'm in my terrace with my cup of coffee. Waiting in vain. where are you and what struggles you've been through finding my castle?
----
last night, the city lights captured me. So I took a quick shower. Put on a good top. Suddenly, it rained. my friend said, "if there's a will there's a way,"... "good point but i wouldn't be wearing my boots" I replied. "dial-a-cab and drop your ass off here" he commanded! so I obliged.
We went to Penthouse. DJ Elmer was playing. My moves were a bit off. Its been ages since I went out to party. Partly my fault because I let myself become a prisoner of my own room. The music started to warm every single cell of my body up... a beer in my hand and a cigarette on the other. No E for me that night. I wanted to go home sane. That other side of me has been long gone. I don't want him resurrected. I'm a good person now. I think.
---
"where's your prince?"... I replied, "I don't know!" cutting the mojo potato in half. I had been in the dance floor all night.. that made me hungry. "He's somewhere", I continued.
"I think you should date a mason." My friend suggested. Then my eyes went clueless waiting for my friend to finish his statement. He could really see a big question mark on my face so he continued "so that someone can break the walls your creating". I jokingly replied "why not a welder, the walls I've created were made of iron."
---
If you have experience being hurt, your self defence skills increases. why would you let yourself be hurt again?! I'm not even aware of these walls but my friend read me correctly. I don't want to become a porcupine. "Go out! meet more people! drop your pots and pails. gardening is for old people. and learn to know them before you put on your guards. We are not getting any younger so don't waste your time."
---
I'm in my terrace. Its raining again. my cup is empty. no sign of him coming home tonight.
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